Back to the Eden – There rarely has been a more eventful place on the face of this planet than the Garden of Eden . From playing venue to Laxmans masterly 281 , to being Dada’s home ground , the Mecca of cricket has seen it all . But probably none is as significant of the first documented human consumption of the red fruit of lust ,The Apple , and the subsequent progenesis of an entire race . And come this IPL , with Dada no more a part of the Knight Riders , the empty Eden Stands might provide them one more chance to resume their erstwhile amorous acts of sexual innuendo , with my parochial brethren playing audience to the probable genesis of a whole new race of species , inspiring Chandrabindu to come up with a sequel to their famous song on modern day voyeurism , Brahma Janen .
Ei IPL a , sei prothom dine
Adam ar Eve ,Eden Gardeney ,
Daam berechhe ,inflationey
Tobu apple , Eve nilo kine
Adam darie , boundaryr dhare
Apple dekhe , angle mare
Adam apple , nilo kere
Gobgobie , khelo chhire ,
Erpor , Brahma janen………
Did Darwin just say ‘ long live Evolution , come the Evolution’!!!
And My Pants Come Off – Lol , ROFL , LMAO . And they are off . I had always know deep inside that this was going to happen , if I continued too long with my pop-culture ways of providing vent to my joyous outbursts , and had been fearing LMAO , ever since the time I had acquired the habit of Rolling On The Floor ( ROFL) instead of the usual and effervescently spontaneous ‘hahaha’ . And finally , I have laughed my Arse off , to become the one single bottomless oddity of this generation , the lone Tooshiless wonder of this world , doomed to the prospect of never wearing a pant again , for the very hinges they were designed to cling on to , have just come off . However , I may not be the last , for I foresee many more falling prey to same baneful antics that have robbed people of the chance of slandering me , using obscenities like A**hole . Oh , how I long to be called an A**hole once more. And while the sight of hoards of tooshyles beings marching about , trouserless , might bring some joy to the nudists , I can already envision Raj Thakaray delivering speeches like 'Jai Tooshy ,Jai Maratha ' , and 'what head is to the north , tooshy is to the south', to resounding applause of the tooshy fanatics.
Too many Legs - As if , robbing me of my bottoms wasn’t enough , to relegate the trousers to the realms of the redundant , now, the stars have started to play truant , to provide me with four legs instead of the usual two that I had always been content with . For I am no more the masculine muscular yet effeminate man emptying pots but rather some four legged hideous monster with the façade of a man , called Sagittarius . And whats worse , I am without a bottom and sporting a tail . And no self respecting four-legged human , with a tail would ever dare to sport a pair of trousers in public . The prospect of my beloved trousers , spending the rest of its days , sequestered in my closet looms large today , with me having to go trouser-less for the rest of my life .
More G – I can already sense friends at NIT going ecstatic . But who ever knew that G was not merely legal in India , that it was up for public tenders , and was sought after by some of the biggest multinational and national majors , that it was not worth a mere 30 rupees at Rajen , but rather billions.
Infact , it is the chief protagonist in one of the biggest scams of India , and the development of a better and improved version has been commissioned by the Government ,the 3G ,much to the joy of the Ganjawalas at my college. Something to rejoice , at last.
Wishing you all a Very Happy New Year …..
Posts
